I only write here when I have a lack of outside conversation. I posted when I was living alone in Ottawa. I was basically just trying to keep a journal of my time. I posted when I was writing my thesis at home. Again, I was at home all day with no one to talk to, and I was using it, in part, as an organization method. To be writing something for fun, rather than because I had to. Once I was working, I had other things to do… Other outlets for my thoughts…
But I’m at home again, with thoughts running through my head, and in need of a place to put them. A way to organize them. A way to keep me thinking.
I don’t write when I’m interesting, because I’m busy doing interesting things. I write when I’m bored, to give me something to do. Which means that the things that I write about aren’t necessarily things I want to (or need to) remember. They’re just the random thoughts that I’m trying to get out. Maybe they’re a way to try to remind myself that I’m actually doing SOMETHING.
I’m wandering around the house with a sleeping girl who refused to nap all afternoon. She needs to sleep, she’s exhausted. And I can’t really DO anything right now. But that’s what I’m doing. I’m helping my daughter sleep. And this is when I write, not when important things are happening (if that were the case, I’d have written a lot in the past few years), but when I have the chance to slow down and just exist.